comedy Archives - Crookbooks https://crookbooks.site/tag/comedy Criminally Funny Books Thu, 06 Feb 2025 19:59:55 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=6.9.4 https://crookbooks.site/wp-content/uploads/2020/10/cropped-512x512-Optimized-Logo-burglar-black-background-32x32.jpg comedy Archives - Crookbooks https://crookbooks.site/tag/comedy 32 32 Breakfast at Tinman’s https://crookbooks.site/all-posts/short-stories/breakfast-at-tinmans Thu, 30 Jan 2025 20:36:41 +0000 https://crookbooks.site/?p=3721        Tinman thought all meals were important, so he wasn’t sure if breakfast ranked any higher than the others. But it certainly was his favorite. He felt it was essential to get the metabolism working as soon as possible, and he had a fixed menu that rarely varied.     Of course, before anything […]

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]]> Philosophic Shopper https://crookbooks.site/all-posts/short-stories/philosophic-shopper Thu, 30 Jan 2025 20:37:54 +0000 https://crookbooks.site/?p=3723    Peach pulled the car into one of the four bays at the car wash on Moana Lane. He reached into the back and grabbed an umbrella. He hopped out, and Tinman, shaking his head, followed.      It was three in the morning, and no one else had decided it was the ideal time to […]

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]]> By Cook or by Crook https://crookbooks.site/all-posts/short-stories/by-cook-or-by-crook Thu, 30 Jan 2025 20:38:50 +0000 https://crookbooks.site/?p=3725      Peach wasn’t sure how to go about it. The concept was perfect. His instincts told him so, and they never failed him. He knew the whole thing would be a cinch if he could only figure out how to put it in motion.     In truth, he knew how to get it going, […]

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]]> Carrera de Tacos https://crookbooks.site/all-posts/short-stories/carrera-de-tacos Thu, 30 Jan 2025 20:39:54 +0000 https://crookbooks.site/?p=3727      Tek sat in his car and listened to his stomach growl, apparently as upset as he was. He always seemed to be the getaway driver and it was starting to piss him off. Everyone knew he had better burglar skills than Tinman, but he never got to be in on the actual heists. […]

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]]> Casserole Calamity https://crookbooks.site/all-posts/short-stories/casserole-calamity Thu, 30 Jan 2025 20:40:56 +0000 https://crookbooks.site/?p=3729       Tinman had been waiting for a week, and it was driving him crazy. At times like this, even pool wasn’t enough to distract him. The only thing that worked was cooking. So that’s what he was doing.     He and Peach had done all the groundwork for their latest upcoming heist, and […]

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]]> Soup du Jour https://crookbooks.site/all-posts/short-stories/soup-du-jour Thu, 30 Jan 2025 20:41:42 +0000 https://crookbooks.site/?p=3731       “I need a lemon.”Peach paused for a brief moment to take in this totally unexpected and baffling statement by his brother. As he went back to fitting the little key into the cash register drawer he was currently working on he said, “Gosh, I’m so glad you told me. That’s crucial info […]

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]]> Thai One On https://crookbooks.site/all-posts/short-stories/thai-one-on Thu, 30 Jan 2025 20:42:24 +0000 https://crookbooks.site/?p=3733      “Mee makhuea mai khrab?” asked Tinman.     “Eh?”     Tinman grumbled. He knew he was using the right Thai words and tones because he had been taught how to say it by a Thai person—the same person who was now staring at him like he was speaking Kurdish.     “Makhuea!” declared Tinman forcibly.  […]

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]]> Food Fight https://crookbooks.site/all-posts/short-stories/food-fight Thu, 30 Jan 2025 20:45:07 +0000 https://crookbooks.site/?p=3735      Most longtime residents of northern Nevada did not appreciate the recent influx of wealthy Californians fleeing from high taxes and dense living in Silicon Valley and the Bay Area.     Peach and Tinman, however, found it quite advantageous. The new transplants seemed to think Nevada was quaint and free from all the dangers […]

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]]> Real Crooks Do Eat Quiche https://crookbooks.site/all-posts/short-stories/real-crooks-do-eat-quiche Thu, 30 Jan 2025 20:43:02 +0000 https://crookbooks.site/?p=3737      “And this is exactly how you found it, ma’am?” asked Detective Kehoe.     “Yes. It was open just like that,” said the richly attired dowager. “But nothing is missing.”     “Funny they would leave all that jewelry,” said Detective Romero.     “Let me guess,” said Kehoe. “Ma’am, these pieces are duplicates, aren’t they? […]

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]]> Hunger Pangs https://crookbooks.site/all-posts/short-stories/hunger-pangs Thu, 30 Jan 2025 20:43:41 +0000 https://crookbooks.site/?p=3739      A disgruntled employee fingered the job. Peach first met him at Floyd’s Fireside Chat, one of his favorite drinking establishments. A month earlier, the tipster was fired from his warehouse job over some minor infraction. Now, he had it in for the owner and wanted to make him pay. Peach intimated that he […]

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]]> What A Crock https://crookbooks.site/all-posts/short-stories/what-a-crock Thu, 30 Jan 2025 20:44:20 +0000 https://crookbooks.site/?p=3741      “What do you mean you can’t open it?” asked Tinman, even though the question was unfair, and he damn well knew it.     Making certain he knew it, Peach said, “I didn’t say that, and you know it. What I said is I can’t open it with the tools I have.”     “On […]

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